Being Available...

Here is a beautiful quote from the book, 'Becoming a Reflective Practitioner'. The following is a reflection that was written by a nurse.
"Although we have just met, I have been involved with him (the patient) in intimate physical care - washing him, being here while he was on the toilet, wiping his bottom, shaving him - and emotional presence. Tom easily discloses other aspects of his life. He has been married for 59 years to 'wifie', his endearing term for his wife. Indeed, his diamond anniversary was in February. He becomes alive talking about his wife and their life together. She visits in the afternoons. He desperately wants to go home but is anxious about the future. HE is so dependent physically and even though they had a support package, he fears he will be too much of a burden for his 'wifie'. I wonder if he would be happier with television, some music or a paper? No, he just wants 'wifie' and to go home. I sense my need to 'fix it' for him, an almost overwhelming need to take his distress away from him. But of course, I am becoming anxious on his behalf, beginning to absorb his distress, which I recognize and repattern to be available to him.
Rubbing his smooth face, he thanks me. If feels good. He offers me a mind - his gift in return for my attention, my respect and kindness. In seeking to connect with me, he needs to give something back. By accepting, I honor this need and he can honor himself. We begin to tune into a reciprocal relationship, where I can response with an appropriate level of involvement with him. In this way I synchronize our rhythms of relating with each other at this moment. In tune with him, I am most available to him."
I think this story speaks for itself. Through this healthy nurse/patient interaction the patient is left with more self respect and more dignity and the nurse is left feeling connected to the patient and to the practice of nursing.

"At the end there is a quote by L. Hall, "It is impossible to nurse any more of a person than that person allows us to see."